Martha's Vineyard Directions

This is copied and pasted from an actual set of directions which people are supposed to follow:

"Go west on State Road past the in-town supermarket, past the
out-of-town Black Dog, past the Tashmoo Overlook and tke first
right,on LAMBERT'S COVE ROAD.

Go perhaps 200 yards past Tashmoo Farm and turn right onto a big
dirt driveway just past a set of  about two dozen mailboxes on
Northern Pines Road (actually it's Chappaquonsett Road, but the
Northern Pines people can't handle that, so we try not to rattle their
cage).

Continue on Northern Pines Road [sic] about 3/4 mile, past the
Thompson's farm on the left.  If the hogs are loose, don't get out of
the car.

Just beyond there will be a fork marked by trees with multiple signs
attached including signs for the POND HOUSE and the SWINDLE. Take a
right angle turn to the left there on Army Road (built by the Army in
the 1940s when they used the area for amphib landing practice).

Follow Army Road and it's famed "Six Hills" until it enters a
clearing.  Do not go left to Hilly and Nancy Thompson's house.  Bear
right, following the signs for the POND HOUSE .

About 200 yards beyond will be the 2nd drive to the right to a
two-story cape visible through the trees. Voila! You have reached the
POND HOUSE.

If you can see the water you have gone just a little too far."

I wish Mapquest was kind enough to tell you what to do in the event of hogs.